HOW TO PICK GIRLS UP IN A CLUB

20:57:00

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Since I did one on how to pick guys up in a club for the ladies, here is how to pick girls up in a club for my male readers. I know, you guys are probably gonna be like "BUT YOU ARE A GIRL, SO HOW WOULD YOU KNOW?". Trust me, I do know...and you know why I know...because I am a girl and I will be telling you how girls ACTUALLY really react.

Again, I am not responsible if she starts avoiding you or does not call you back or whatever but DO KNOW that you are one sexy muthafucker and you deserve better k, trust me.


So you are busy partying with the rest of the dudes and whoaa.."who is that beautiful stranger?". Damn, you got your eyes on her and you are thinking "nah im not leaving this place without that prize". Here are a few things that can help you get that sexy mama.


1. CHECK IF SHE HAS ANY ACCOMPANYING MALE WITH HER 
Hunneh, the last thing you want to get  is to get punched by her 1.89m tall buff boyfriend. So please ah please, check first and make sure that her boyfriend isn't there or when you think it is safe. Study her from afar like how you would if you were in Africa and studying the behaviors of an Ostrich. Remember ah, studying an ostrich.It is not an ambush. Not a leopard preying on a frigging ostrich.  (i have no idea why I just compared females to ostriches but nvm its okay). However when you study, please do not be a creep.

2. WHEN DO I KNOW I AM BEING A CREEP?

It creeps a girl out when you are constantly looking at her like she is your 2pc chicken KFC meal. Please hun please. We do NOT want to be a creep. For every 10minutes that you look at her, please look away after that and then look at her again. Do not open your eyes so wide and at the same time try to raise your left eyebrow. Chicks dig that because you know why, it will remind them of Johnny Bravo and Johnny was probably the sexual awakening for a lot of girls out there. I know he was for me. #kiddingnotkidding

3. BUT CHANELLE, WHAT IF SHE STARTS MOVING AWAY.
THEN YOU GET IN THERE AND MOVE IN , SOLDIER. CLOSE IN TO YOUR TARGET.
TAKE WHATEVER SKILLS YOU LEARNT WHILE SERVING THE NATION AND JUST PUT IT TO GOOD USE.

4. WHO'S YOUR DADDY NOW
So congratulations, you manage to get her in a corner or rather away from her friends. Time to work it and tell her " if this club is a meat market, you must be the prime rib". Okay on second thoughts I think no because she think you are gonna chop her up and throw her remains and body parts all over Singapore. Hmm , I think use this  "Baby, you're the hot ass in my shot glass." Girls gonna be loving you because they would think you wanna buy them a drink and if she is after your wallet, she is definitely gonna be asking you to keep buying her drinks and when she is drunk you can pretty much dapao (take away ) her home and romp all night long. 


And there you have it, tips on how you can actually pick chicks up in a club. Sheesh, i am TOO good for this. Love agencies better start hiring me. 



With Love,
Me
(A girl outside but a bro on the inside)


PS : No, I don't have a penis


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