Dealing with Insecurities


I've been pretty much on a roll lately with my constant updates and blogpost.
Ahhh lots of things that I wonder and ponder about.

I am not an expert when it comes to dealing with insecurities but I've learnt a lot of things when I am not in a relationship and viewing things from a third party or outsider's view. Upon analysing, I have realised that there were some mistakes that I have committed in the past and which could have been prevented if I hadn't paid attention to them or let them affect me so much.


There will always be people who is going to be better than terms of looks , physique and everything else. To have insecurity as one of the main issues that you struggle as a couple in a relationship is pretty common but then again, you probably shouldn't care about it so much as it can bring in a lot of unhappiness between couples and then you will just start having unnecessary conflicts with your partners. When I was in a relationship, there were times that I got insecure. There were so many prettier girls out there and my ex was a Chinese so, being of a different race also added onto the insecurities that I've had during the relationship. Now that I am out of the relationship, I can see clearly that to be honest there was no need for me to be insecure. If your partner really loves you for you, he will only have his eyes on you and will not do anything to make you feel insecure. Sure, you can let your partner know that you are uncomfortable with his actions but in any case...he shouldn't make you feel insecure and has to have respect for you and your feelings.

You may think that your partner likes this other girl just because he hangs out with her often or perhaps they might share a common interest or hobby. But whenever you do that, take the time to see that he is YOUR boyfriend and not theirs. If you wonder if he ever likes her or whatsoever, just keep this in mind. He is in a relationship with you and not them. If he really likes them, then something would have happened way before you both got together because chances are he already knew them before he knows you. yeah sure, they'd probably dated for a little while or so but you know, at the end of the day, he is still yours. Therefore I feel that you probably shouldn't feel insecure or worry so much that your boyfriend might actually run away with another girl unless you have evidence and then you can just ask him about it.

But yeah, the point is...I feel that insecurities shouldn't play that much of an important role and it shouldn't be the reason why you argue with your partners or whatsoever. Communication is key. Don't try to argue back or start being defensive because then things would get heated up and ugly. Opposites attract anyway. Maybe he is more of the extrovert while you are not..but he is totally cool with it. He  loves your personality even though you might think that you don't match. A good boyfriend is someone who doesn't change you and is willing to accept you for who you are regardless of your past or present. Maybe you might have a bad history or past that you are ashamed of..but if a person really loves you for you, they will be able to accept your flaws.

I am insecure myself. I am skinny, don't have a nice smile and nice teeth but fuck, you know what...if a guy really loves me, he should accept me for who I am and not make me feel like shit and humiliate me in front of him or his friends. If he is the type who humiliates me then I rather be single coz that is not what boyfriends/husbands do. Honestly, if you have someone who does that to you, that person has no form of respect for you and you shouldn't waste your time on them.

Have a good mid-week :)

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