When you should step out of a relationship

02:30:00

As you grow older, you get more experience when it comes to relationships and love.I am not a relationship expert but these are a few warning signs that one should take note of before or during a relationship. Honestly, no one remains the same after a relationship has failed. We all grow up differently and we take a few learning points from that breakup.


For me personally, I would think that these few factors are some of the more important areas that I look at when it comes to choosing what I want in a partner or if I decide to date them.

  • failing to understand
  • differences in mindsets
  • insecurities
  • abuse
  • controlling
  • rebound

I mean that is the whole point of dating right. To get to know someone and then foresee if there is any chemistry between you guys or if there is any good points that you may like from the other party and then start a relationship. 



Failing to understand

I definitely can never settle for someone who does not understand me but instead makes a lot of assumptions of me and then just jumping into conclusion and then pushing the blame to me if we are having an argument or so. I don't know why but sometimes I do feel that some of the guys whom I've met, their egos are just way up there. I don't know why sometimes they just wouldn't want to apologize for their attitude as well even if the girl is the one at fault in the first place. I feel that if there ever was an argument between two people, both parties should apologize and not start playing the blaming game because it will just make matters worst.

If you are with someone whom wants you to change your ways and can't accept you for who you are in the beginning, then I feel that you shouldn't even consider of starting or jumping into a relationship with them. I feel that, you don't really have the rights to change someone. Maybe you can try speaking to them about how you feel instead and just talk about it. Honestly, I feel that it is better to talk to them about this when you guys have known each other better and roughly understand each other's patterns.


Difference in Mindsets

Relationships may also fail due to the differences in mindsets between the two. When you are in a relationship, the both of you are pretty much in a team together. In order for the team to succeed, you need a lot of cooperation, motivation and teamwork between the two of you. So if you guys do not think on the same page, you might have a lot of arguments and... nope, the relationship will not work out.


Insecurities 

Honestly if you are always feeling insecure in your relationship, I don't think that you should be in a relationship because you are already having trust issues. But sometimes I do not blame people for having insecurities because it could be due to the behaviour of the other party, that the person has issues with insecurities. If someone in the relationship is feeling insecure , it is the other party's job to ensure that the other party doesn't feel that way. I know sometimes it may be really tiring to convince people to have trust in you. It can actually make the other party feel annoyed. I feel that when it comes to insecurities, it is a two way thing. You need trust to get rid of insecurities. If you don't have trust, then ask yourself why are you still together?


Abuse

Abuse can either be physically or mentally. If you are with someone who is hitting you, I suggest that you leave the relationship immediately. If the person starts giving you death threats and such, you may actually just go to the police station and make a report. Sometimes I wonder why do people still stay in a relationship even though they get hit and such. I feel that abuse can also go mental when you are with someone whom keeps fucking your mind up. Fucks your mind up and then victimizes themselves. Nope, no thanks


Controlling

I am definitely not the type of girl who would expect my boyfriend to report to me every single time nor am I the type who asks my boyfriend for permissions before I do something like maybe hanging out with my girls. I just cannot stand the whole idea of reporting. I mean yeah sure, you love someone but that doesn't mean that they need to report every single time. And the worst is when these people actually get annoyed because maybe you forgot to reply or you were just busy with work. They just go full retard on you. I feel that it is a nightmare. I'm definitely okay if my boyfriend or significant other decides to go party or so, as long as he knows what he is doing and not abuse my trust. If you are with someone whom controls every single thing that you do, please dump them. 


Rebound

Last but not least , rebound. I have to admit that it is a huge turn off if the person I was dating kept talking about his ex. Like dude, my mom didn't go into labour and to subsequently go through a caesarian to give birth to a daughter (me) just to listen to you rant about how your girlfriend is doing and how walking around Orchard Road just reminds you of the good old times that you both share. If you are someone with a messy heart, please spend some time being single. Sort your heart out first AND THEN get into a relationship. If you are all sad and heartbroken and desperate to get a boyfriend/girlfriend because you INSIST that you need to have someone to prove to your ex to, you are going to get yourself involved in another lot of shit. Messy hearts make messy decisions, bad decisions to be exact.


So there you have it.

Obviously these are all based on my opinion. :)


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