Mindsets that I feel should change


So we are all living in the 21st century however there are still people around with mindsets that I feel should be long gone or at least have a change.
Do note that all of these mindsets that I am stating is purely based on my opinion of how I see things and the culture and environment that I am in.


I am not really the sort who would talk about work politics or whatsoever but if there is one thing that I feel needs a change, it would be how people relate a person's job performance based on hierarchy levels. Before anything, let me just say that this is a generalisation or rather mindset that majority of people have from where I am based from. So Singapore as it is an Asian country. I believe that there are some companies that use performance as an indicator of whether one deserves the reward or no. But it just annoys the heck out of me, like when it comes to reporting certain general messages that they feel that only people from that upper level are allowed to talk to the higher management peeps whereas those of a lower level are not allowed to.Thankfully the place where I am working at does not practise such weird "rules". These are taken based from conversations that my friends and I would talk about over our usual dinner and drinks conversations.

No doubt, you have to respect your superiors however, if you are going to do things based on who deserves to talk to or has more priority to over the other party based on seniority, I would say that all of it is just a pile of bullshit. I mean so what if that person A has spent more years as compared to person B. It doesn't necessarily mean that person A deserves more good things to come their way as a reward for their long term service in the industry.

At the same time, I would like to think that this is an issue too if the ones who are superior are younger than those who have been working there for a while now and so there is a lot of jealousy in between. It is a competitive world afterall. So I feel that people should change this mindset that it is possible for younger people to hold a position higher than yours if they have the certain qualifications that is required as well as the key skills.

Women who wear makeup / wearing less = slutty/attention seeking/whore

Ugh where do I even begin? 
We are in 2016 people. Gone are the days whereby women who wear thick makeup are called prostitutes and girls who happen to wear a little less are called slutty or attention seeking. There is always this mindset that peoeple have of girls who wear makeup which is to attract the attention of a guy and to look good for a guy. People would often ask "Why do you put on makeup?" , "I like you better without makeup". Well, the reason why girls do wear makeup is because makeup makes us feel better of ourselves and it's therapeutic. It is just like creating art on your face. Ask yourself this, why would a girl bother perfecting her eyeliner just for a guy? Have you ever met a guy who appreciates how sharp or on point a girl's eyeliner is ? No. They are just doing it for themselves. So I have friends who are dating guys who don't allow them to put makeup on and I just feel that that isn't right at all. If you love someone, you would love them no matter what they have on their face and support whatever they do if it makes you happy. How can you just tell your girlfriend that you do not like it when she has makeup on? Dude, she is not putting makeup on because of you. Do you think a girl spends her time choosing between what lipsticks at Sephora just for you? No, she is choosing it so that it matches her skin tone well and that she is able to wear it. She is spending her time at Sephora for her ownself. Even if you are wondering why the heck does she have lots of red streaks on her forearms at Sephora, it is because she wants to see which reds look better on her. 

I feel that nude photography or if a girl wears less in her photos or outside, it is perfectly fine because all I feel is that is depends on whether it turns out as trashy or nude but with class. You can't just have this mentality that all of these women who are naked or wearing less are considered slutty or attention seeking or is a whore. Sluts and whores are only used when a female is sleeping with a lot of men all at the same time for a certain advantage. Do note that for this, you can't also call prostitutes or strippers as whores or sluts or tell them that their job is degrading or whatsoever. Some of these women just happen to have such jobs because they need the money to maybe pay their rent, school fees or whatsoever. It takes a lot of confidence to actually go nude for a photograph. If a girl posts such photos, it is her own way of saying that she is happy with her body and she feels proud of it. I love taking such photos but it is not because I want the attention of men. I am already having some of their attention with my conversations and how I make them laugh with my lame jokes (just saying). I just don't have an explanation as to why I like taking such shots. I love my body even though people are always telling me that I am too skinny and all. There is nothing much that I can do now, is it? I am just born skinny and I have a high metabolism rate. So what if I am all just bones. I am happy with myself and I don't need someone to tell me to have a burger so that I would be considered as "acceptable" in their eyes. What matters is that I am happy and so people should just let other people live and do whatever they want. Who are you tell someone if what they are doing is acceptable or not?

Muslim girls who do not wear the tudung are considered bad

In case you are wondering what my religion is, I am a Muslim. Since young , I have always been told by people (friends/strangers) as to why I do not wear the tudung and would tell me stuffs like "Oh tudung chicks are better as compared to those who are not". Not dissing tudung chicks or whatever here but how can one even make that comparison? I mean you are using the word better based on what? It is just a whole stereotypical mindset. There are muslim girls who do not wear the tudung but they have the nicest and bestest of hearts. Whether or not a girl decides to wear the tudung or not, it is completely up to her to decide what she wants. You can't force someone to just wear it if their hearts are not ready for it and at the same time, just please stop making such assumptions of people.

Girls are only interested in money

Yes, we are. I won't deny that but it is really important that if you want to look for a life partner , he has to at least manage his own finances and has money. The standards of living is expensive and you can't just depend on love in order to survive. However guys, if you still think that girls are only interested in your money, maybe it is about high time that you start differentiating and finding out what kind of girl she is. If she is the materialistic sort or the kind who doesn't mind you earning an average income. There are different type of girls and it is just important to find out exactly what type of girl she is. No girl would like to be with a man who does not have his own money or is borrowing money from other people or dependent on others for money. And the same goes for a guy, I mean if you wanna marry someone, you would want her to at least have a source of income as well.

Forever a pessimist

I wouldn't say that is is wrong to sometimes be a pessimist but also...not to forever be a pessimist. It is always good to weigh between the positive and the negative when you are analysing your current situation or before you embark on something. But if you are getting excessively pessimistic, no one wants to be around you. If you are sad or bothered over something once in a while, it is fine. But when it becomes really extreme and all, you just end up being this annoying thing wallowing in your own self pity and sorry state. You just become annoying and people will start leaving you. I am going to be blunt but for those of you who have like "so sad, nobody cares about me anymore" as your facebook statuses or instagram captions...it is because of you. I would think that these people had tried to be there for you but are so sick of your shit that they just decided to leave you. I may not know but how fucked up can your life be or get? There is always a solution to everything. Even if a person killed someone by accident or maybe with intentions, there will always be two outcomes should he start to feel guilty. One is that he can always turn himself in or two , just kill himself if he is too afraid to go to jail.

Not everything is going to go your way

If your parents have been giving in to your every demands and requests, maybe it is about time for you to realise that not everything is going to go your way and also not everyone is going to agree and comply to whatever demands and requests you have. People have a choice. And I am sorry that some of these choices that people make are not for the sake of appeasing you. They have their own rights and you can't force them to just adhere to what you want and get all pissed off when they do not do what you want.

Just a few thoughts that I have and would like to share with the rest of you. :)
Happy Mid week!

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